This months development thought is around difficult conversations. You know the ones you really start to dread and then mess them up!
The fll transcript of it is at: http://www.jonpaulassociates.co.uk/ppc/perceptual%20positions.htm
Have fun,
Jon
Wednesday, May 30, 2007
Monday, April 16, 2007
Leaders and values
This months development thought is around leadership skills; there are positive leadership traits that we could all show, that would improve ourselves. One example of this is how we feel good by inspiring others.
A good leader acknowledges individuals' values without judgement or criticism. Values are key, and individual to each of us. Look and listen for the values of those around you.
People use their values to judge whether they've done a well, or badly at things; so when you want somebody to really appreciate your praise think about how you can link your praise with their values. You'll be encouraging them to praise themselves, as well as accept your praise.
A good leader acknowledges individuals' values without judgement or criticism. Values are key, and individual to each of us. Look and listen for the values of those around you.
People use their values to judge whether they've done a well, or badly at things; so when you want somebody to really appreciate your praise think about how you can link your praise with their values. You'll be encouraging them to praise themselves, as well as accept your praise.
Wednesday, March 21, 2007
Great icebreaker, fun and discover something
Ever wondered how to get a group of people to mix a bit more and have some fun - let alone learn something about each other?
This month's tip is a very simple exercise that works very well with a group of more than 4 people, up to any size you care to try. It works well as an ice breaker in teams that know each other, or don't!
Give each person a post it note and a pen. They must write two truths and one lie about themselves on the note, stick it onto their back and move around the room. As they go round the room they read other peoples notes and put a tick beside the one they think is a lie on the other persons note.
After a few minutes where everybody always end up laughing at some of the incredible things that get written, it's time to work out the winner. The winner is the one with the fewest ticks beside their lie, as their truths must have been the most preposterous.
See what you can find out about people you though you knew. If you have any questions about this, or any other of the monthly tips, don't hesitate to call or email me. Good luck getting to know people better,
21/3/07
This month's tip is a very simple exercise that works very well with a group of more than 4 people, up to any size you care to try. It works well as an ice breaker in teams that know each other, or don't!
Give each person a post it note and a pen. They must write two truths and one lie about themselves on the note, stick it onto their back and move around the room. As they go round the room they read other peoples notes and put a tick beside the one they think is a lie on the other persons note.
After a few minutes where everybody always end up laughing at some of the incredible things that get written, it's time to work out the winner. The winner is the one with the fewest ticks beside their lie, as their truths must have been the most preposterous.
See what you can find out about people you though you knew. If you have any questions about this, or any other of the monthly tips, don't hesitate to call or email me. Good luck getting to know people better,
21/3/07
Tuesday, February 20, 2007
Questions and answers
Questioning and listening to the answer are two really important parts of understanding somebody else. To get somebody to change is normally easier if you understand them.
Many people were taught about the 5 W's, why, who, what, where and when; so remember to use them, BUT don't use why!!
What, where, when and who are easier factual questions to answer, and don't imply that the person being questioned is wrong. These can give great information that you can work with.
When asked WHY the first typical response to to justify oneself, immediately this means that the person is closing down. In NLP terms the why questions goes straight to the realms of beliefs and values, which are close to the core of the person; the other 4 W questions deal more with behaviours, environment and capability, all of which are less threatening.
Make a change with your questioning and get to know more.
Jon
20/2/07
Many people were taught about the 5 W's, why, who, what, where and when; so remember to use them, BUT don't use why!!
What, where, when and who are easier factual questions to answer, and don't imply that the person being questioned is wrong. These can give great information that you can work with.
When asked WHY the first typical response to to justify oneself, immediately this means that the person is closing down. In NLP terms the why questions goes straight to the realms of beliefs and values, which are close to the core of the person; the other 4 W questions deal more with behaviours, environment and capability, all of which are less threatening.
Make a change with your questioning and get to know more.
Jon
20/2/07
Wednesday, January 24, 2007
There is no failure...
I've listened to quite a few people recently who have talked about "failing" to do something (new year resolutions being a typical one!).
Worrying about failure keeps you focussed on the past and on the problems. If you examine withe results you've already got, even if they're not what you wanted, you can focus on possibilities and move forwards.
In NLP (neuro linguistic programming) there is a basic presupposition "There is no failure, only feedback". This is a very powerful statement that can make a lot of difference to your life. You can choose whether to be waylaid by the undesirable results or learning lessons to help you move forwards.
So when faced with "failure", ask yourself the following questions, and allow yourself to grow by listening to the answers.
What am I aiming to achieve?; what have I achieved so far?; what feedback have I had?; what lessons have I learned?; how can I put those lessons to good use?; how will I measure my success next time?
Then go for it again, but with new information.
If you have any questions about this, or any other of the monthly tips, don't hesitate to call or email me. Good luck with any feedback you may be lucky enough to get,
Jon
24/1/07
Worrying about failure keeps you focussed on the past and on the problems. If you examine withe results you've already got, even if they're not what you wanted, you can focus on possibilities and move forwards.
In NLP (neuro linguistic programming) there is a basic presupposition "There is no failure, only feedback". This is a very powerful statement that can make a lot of difference to your life. You can choose whether to be waylaid by the undesirable results or learning lessons to help you move forwards.
So when faced with "failure", ask yourself the following questions, and allow yourself to grow by listening to the answers.
What am I aiming to achieve?; what have I achieved so far?; what feedback have I had?; what lessons have I learned?; how can I put those lessons to good use?; how will I measure my success next time?
Then go for it again, but with new information.
If you have any questions about this, or any other of the monthly tips, don't hesitate to call or email me. Good luck with any feedback you may be lucky enough to get,
Jon
24/1/07
Friday, January 12, 2007
New year resolutions
At this time of year many people start to think about new year resolutions, which often last about 2 weeks into the next year.
Setting goals is a central part of coaching, and how you go about this can radically affect your chance of success.
Get a really clear picture in your head of what you want (NOT what you don't want); really work on the picture - turn up the colour, play with the brightness, size and sounds till it becomes more motivational.
What phrase will help you conjure up that picture, as you'll want to revisit it regularly if you're to succeed in getting your goal. The phrase needs to be short and phrased positively, in the present tense. For example "I am a confident person", would be much better than "I will become confident".
Set yourself small steps that you can achieve, rather than one giant task which will seem too daunting. Celebrate success with each of the steps you achieve, that's one step closer to your ultimate goal. Most importantly write it all down, and re-read it regularly.
These are key pointers from the overall goal setting process; the January workshop contains much more about it, or go online and order my free goal setting booklet (link below).
I wish you every success with your new year resolution, and a very happy new year.
21/12/06
Setting goals is a central part of coaching, and how you go about this can radically affect your chance of success.
Get a really clear picture in your head of what you want (NOT what you don't want); really work on the picture - turn up the colour, play with the brightness, size and sounds till it becomes more motivational.
What phrase will help you conjure up that picture, as you'll want to revisit it regularly if you're to succeed in getting your goal. The phrase needs to be short and phrased positively, in the present tense. For example "I am a confident person", would be much better than "I will become confident".
Set yourself small steps that you can achieve, rather than one giant task which will seem too daunting. Celebrate success with each of the steps you achieve, that's one step closer to your ultimate goal. Most importantly write it all down, and re-read it regularly.
These are key pointers from the overall goal setting process; the January workshop contains much more about it, or go online and order my free goal setting booklet (link below).
I wish you every success with your new year resolution, and a very happy new year.
21/12/06
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